Get a coconut and open it carefully, so that you have 2 or 3 large pieces of shell which can be put back together and sealed. Obviously, you'd drain out the water.
Collect whatever you could connected to the establishment, business cards; something signed in an official capacity with the title of the signer, letterhead, etc. and put them in the largest piece of shell. It makes things so much easier if you can break the
coconut in 2 pieces, so that one is as large and cup shaped as possible.
Then, add coffee grounds (to darken the situation) lemon juice and vinegar (to sour the situation), lots of cayenne pepper (to heat things up and make them volatile). Some kind of hard liquor might be a good addition so that the people who should be paying attention to the situation get *drunk* and stupid and sloppy with the business.
Put the coconut shell pieces together and
seal them up securely with melted wax (red, black or white would be the colors I'd use).
Take the coconut to a dump or some place strewn with trash and garbage. Kick it around the area as if you're kicking around a soccer ball (get the whole works shaken up and unstable) then tuck the coconut amongst the trash so it's hidden.